The ABP for Magnum PI has reached halfway across the Pacific for assistance with the investigation involving a tedious situation in Detroit, Michigan. Already, T.C. and team have successfully retrofitted the 1980’s helicopter for a pressurized roller coaster ride at 36,000 feet in the teeth of the jet stream dragon in hopes of reaching the edge of the North American continent in 7 hours.
Once Magnum arrives in the motor city on the scene after hitching a Greyhound Bus in Portland, Oregon, it will be only a matter of time before the case is sliced perfectly in all its pepperoni glory and goodness.
Apparently, Mohamad Bazzi knows pork toppings on pizza pies. Fox News reports that the former flatbread industry worker, claims to have the amazing talent to discern regular pepperoni from Halal-blessed pepperoni. In an incident which will surely lead to a non-legal setting precedent, Bazzi allegedly ordered a Halal pepperoni pizza from a Detroit-area Little Caesars pizza joint in March only to discover upon consuming half the pie, that the meat was in fact not as advertised. After becoming physically ill in the wake of eating a few sacrilegious but delicious slices, like a sensible person carefully preparing to file a frivolous lawsuit, he returned in May to the same franchise to again order the Halal pepperoni special. A worker at the location alleges that Bazzi chose regular pepperoni, but requested that staff place a Halal sticker on the pizza box. There is no mention of an official Halal menu on the Little Caesars corporate website and it has to be assumed that offering a “religious congruent” menu is at the discretion of the individual franchise.
Last Thursday, Bazzi and attorney Majed Moughn, officially filed a $100 million dollar lawsuit in Wayne County Circuit Court against Little Caesars and a couple of employees from the possible offending location where the mystery of the spirituality of the pepperoni originated. Moughn, who is the true definition of consummate and upstanding legal professional, has a documented and lively history of filing irregular and ambiguous claims, including a class action suit against the deep pockets of McDonald’s, where his clients complained that the chicken they were served was not Halal. The case was settled for $7oo thousand.
While no reasonable judge should give any plausible credence to the claims surrounding the meat mystery, will Bazzi’s self-proclaimed talents to identify spiritually cleansed cured meats from regular toppings hold up as viable evidence in court? How will the unexpected and striking appearance of a mustache-clad Magnum PI at the right moment with Higgins by his side, throw Moughn’s well directed symphony of testimony and subversion into a wreck babbling conjecture? Stay tuned for the stirring outcome and remember that the key fixture of the Magnum PI costume is the Detroit Tigers baseball cap.
Read the Fox News article here.