Have you tried to talk sense with someone who is hell bent on being right? Have you tried to say “no” to someone only to acquiesce in order to calm him down? If you are in a relationship with an angry person, you know just how difficult it is to set a boundary, ask for something you need, […]
9 Things Narcissists Say to Make You Feel Stupid
One major tactic narcissists use to get their way is making other people feel inferior and stupid. Imagine opening up about a problem to a person you love, and then hearing, “Well you should have seen that coming,” or “Why in the world did you do that?” Ugh. Right to the gut, right? You hoped to receive some support […]
A Life Hack to Make Hard Times Easier
Most people can handle a few stressors at a time, without being completely sidelined. But have you ever felt like some stressors just keep coming, like wave after wave not giving you a chance to get back on your feet? Hello to the wet-headed Puget Sounders, the East Coast Patriots, the California Surfers and the […]
When People-Pleasing Doesn’t Work
We all do it from time to time – say something we don’t mean, just to keep the peace. Keep quiet, when we should really speak up. Worry too much what other people think. Unfortunately, people-pleasing can create more trouble than it solves in the long run. Relationships can often get stuck in destructive patterns […]
Starting Over
Have you ever felt like a situation was so hopeless that it would never get better? Like something was so far gone that nothing could restore it? In business, one might say it’s time to “cut your losses.” In fishing, one might say, “find a new fishing hole.” Miners find a new claim. But what […]
Conflict Resolution: Three Keys to Turn Your Conflict Around
Recently I was asked to teach a Conflict Resolution class, to which I immediately said “YES!” Just think of all the sparks this class could create. My counseling work with couples taught me that conflict, if navigated well, has the power to deepen love, strengthen committment, and even take people to new levels of cooperation. […]