Just try to imagine how many ways a gigantic monster with a lasting hunger in engulfing smaller media entities can be portrayed across the logarithmic expanding galaxy of programming that Disney offers to a global audience. How does a tentacle orphaned organism discovering its feminine side complete with a penchant for the stock market in hitting home runs past the orbit of Alpha Centauri sound?
With the pending acquisition of the majority of 21st Century Fox entertainment holdings, the company is legally capable of characterizing the horrific television beast, measured in parsecs, through cartoons, documentaries, movies, (fake) news, sporting events, reality television and adult viewership options. Yes, the house that Mickey Mouse built, holds interest in the perverted arts. Tell that to the kids the next time the idea of a pilgrimage to the wonderland under the tinseled skies of smog comes up between rare breaks in the online gaming monotony at the breakfast nook. Thankfully, Goofy and the venerable cast of animated characters will not end up picking up the slack for the departed Bill O’Reilly over at Fox News, as CNBC reports that Rupert Murdoch will maintain control over the conservative television. Rumors are spreading like wildfire linking Goofy with a number of sexual harassment complaints, which allegedly stemmed from incidents in the 1950’s and in the height of the disco era.
The $52 billion unprecedented deal, which saves Murdoch from accruing billions in annual debt, is highlighted by the Disney acquisition of the Fox movie creation mechanism and studios, television production capabilities, all Fox television sporting holdings, and the FX and National Geographic channels. However, Disney’s ulterior motive in the win-win situation, is the propagation of a stand alone streaming delivery platform, which experts believe will be a direct competitor to Netflix. Heck, if all goes well, the on demand movie authority will simply exist as just another tasty morsel in the Disney attempt to purchase the abundance of hydrogen within in the sun in solving the pending energy crises. Within 75 years, the company plans to erect structures on the moon in creating shadows that rival the iconic mouse ears of the corporate logo, but not before projecting Show White and The Seven Dwarfs on the lunar surface during full moon cycles. Watch out Walmart, you may be next.
If you wish upon a star, make sure Disney doesn’t own it, or you’ll suffar…
Read the CNBC story here.