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One More Reason To Avoid The Movies? You Don’t Want To Know

May 9, 2018 By Conn Williamson

It is bad enough that the megaplex of Hollywood is generally inhabited by a glitzy and inane subspecies of hominid (Sorry honey, it is not “homonid”.) displaying a voracious appetite for fame, and a blatant political agenda with room for not more than one viewpoint, but now the actual theaters themselves, where audiences spend nation-sized GDP’s on yearly basis, are now apparently diverse sanctuaries for all creatures great and small, especially the microscopic variety.

The BBC News is sad to report that a study of a night at the cinemas in the UK revealed a horrific array of health code violations, leading directly to bacteria levels off the charts in carbonated beverages, cup holders and actual seats in the theater. (Bacteria are quite resilient and certain strains can even survive super heated microclimates.) According to an extensive investigation of movie going facilities, the overall grossness transcends even the wildest nightmares of a daring teenager, in a plague plot B-production teeming with the gooey armies of germs, threatening to deter even the hardest of the hardcore Comic-con trekkie 40-year-old virgin from ever attending a live movie showing again.

In employing the transitive property, the disgusting truth is that population explosion of various bacterium in GB, is probably a full-fledged thriving pox of decrepitness infecting any number of the cinema chains on the North America continent. It is quite telling when the audience cannot tell the difference between the actors and the bugs.

Another Tradition That Is Now Gone Thanks To Entitlement-

The cruel and foreboding conclusion to the study finds that a general lack of proper hygiene is the chief culprit for the mass propagation of microscopic enemies and the star of “2018: Cinema Sickness”, a feature that we should all refuse to attend. #Ugh! Obvious guy says to unload all entertainment stocks and invest in streaming.

Read the BBC News story here at your own risk.

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