In attempting to describe a situation which has reached the limits of the physical universe as manifested by the quark scale due to a rash of quantum singularities birthed by stifling intolerance, at certain times blazing fiction works as the most efficient vehicle in formulating a metaphor worthy of a gaudy florescent SUV demanding two lanes of traffic at two miles per gallon, mud flap goddesses featuring the silhouette of Dolly Parton in her prime, and a vanity license plate declaring “TWNKLTOS.”
With the homeless industrial complex spiraling out of control in the Amazon jungle badlands of Seattle, elected members of the governing body proudly representing citizens with the harrowing heroic avarice, rivaling the legion of doom and the antics of Bizarro enduring an emotional meltdown spurred by a withdrawal from Adderall and cheap bourbon, now face the consequences of texting in the digital age of an impeccable memory. Do they collaborate in a daunting fortress of hexagonal ice crystals, a massive leviathan of a submarine in the depths of the Red Sea, or in a wooden space station parked in a Lagrange point on the opposite side of the sun?
In the wake of the vile corporate head tax scandal and recall they may have well in all three places at once, as the rapid onset of car campers flourishing in occupying scarce parking opportunities downtown and invading quiet neighborhoods with a fleet of vehicles secured from the set of “The Road Warrior”, and the audition of taxpayer funded public injection sites complete with medical professionals in preventing overdoses, the nifty nine cannot seem to last a week in making headlines for boneheaded decisions in practicing renegade Socialism. A recent orgy of texts between public officials and lobbyists secured by the investigative team from the Seattle Times, provides the reader a chilling and insightful look into the meter insanity of a functioning bureaucratic entity, a relentless self-serving organism with an insatiable appetite feasting on unreliable infrastructure. These are the same set of politicians, who authored an aggressive tax on firearms and ammunition, effectively banishing gun shops from within city limits. While contributions from epically corrupt members of Kshama Sawant and Mike O’Brien were not included in the string of despicable texts, a new star has emerged as a proponent for reckless idealism in the form of one M. Lorena Gonzalez.
Gonzalez, in true Legion of Doom form, authored this insidious observation and societal text critique to an aide.
“It breaks my heart that more homeless people will die before the privileged voter is ready to act. “It’s nauseating actually.”
In a single Tweet of 280 or characters or less that the back of Topp’s baseball card could even accommodate, the newly appointed Queen of the homeless managed to encapsulate in a succinct and regal fashion, an eloquent model of the blatantly flawed ideology and deconstruction of reality in pandering to an agenda, a disturbing epidemic afflicting government on multiple levels. The complete lack of accountability in attempting to enact an unfeasible and regressive tax, speaks volumes to the character of the individuals, plotting and planning an unsettling future. Stan Lee has since filed an injunction against LPP, claiming that reputation of his characters are being tarnished by the nastiness of politics. In a true environment of elitism spawned from the dedication and efforts of hardworking individuals and small business owners, the average full-time Seattle city employee nets over $100 thousand in salary per year.
Certainly, Gonzalez is aware of this scathing doublethink, in ungraciously awarding decadent and preposterous incomes to privileged civic workers in tainting the basic principles of economics? The audacity of an elected public servant to engage in unproductive and pointed dialogue on the taxpayer dime is unacceptable. If the arrogantly snarky and biased consensus of the city council was revealed by a single string of texts, the verbal interactions off the record must exist as land mines resounding throughout the hallways and offices of city hall, in a veritable antithesis to the idea of a functioning government.
Apparently, the largely professionally incompetent group of elected officials, expect the taxpayers to fund a dystopia of vagrants, heaps of trash, used drug needles, and the charming inclusion of biological waste on the sidewalks, unsavory elements purposefully introduced by the city in attempting fix a significant budget shortfall. It is the duty of the people to watch the quality of life downtown and in the neighborhoods degrade to the point of the uninhabitable, and all for the sake of a corrupt and burgeoning government. Actually, the voters of Seattle share a wealth of the blame, as they are directly responsible for the tone of the city council. Individuals need to cease selecting candidates strictly by party lines, a heedless practice which effects residents throughout the region. The Emerald City has historically been a fervid ground for extreme Liberalism, and with serious consequences.
The real losers in this scenario are the chronically helpless, who are mercilessly being exploited in a disgusting match of political tug of war, while those addicted to a life of entitlement and heroin flourish in a cruel Darwinian pecking order.
At least Gonzalez got it right with three simple words.
“What a mess.”
Coming to your neighborhood soon, $12 million per mile bike lanes.
Read the Seattle Times investigation here.