This Headline Captures Everything That Is Right And Wrong With Our Country

The massive blitzkrieg of branding efforts burned into the subconscious of the nation for six plus decades with the scope of redundancy capturing the entire galactic spectrum of popular culture, the franchise of restaurants started by Ray Kroc in the burbs of Chicago, readily finds itself intertwined within the tapestry of philosophical discussions.

“Man eats record-setting 30,000th Big Mac”

Certainly a worthy accomplishment within the Costco warehouse mayonnaise tub of culture which measures success in the excessive and the idea that waste is a proud by-product of ingenuity.

As with the cult classic documentary of “Supersize Me”, the concept of McDonald’s exists as a litmus test for the current state of societal health in representing the all-American concept of free market capitalism emanating from a private entity. Well, the frenzied and enticing nature of the fast food business does it again, as the story of a Big Mac aficionado captures the hearts and minds of a nation desperately in need of a Happy Meal respite from the polarizing battlefield of political debate, and the unwillingness of many to detach themselves from the results of the 2016 Presidential election. The counterculture movement is currently lobbying for the company to genderize the classic trademarked hamburger and putting pressure on officials at the fast food regime to toy with the idea of adding a “Big Bertha” featuring vegan patties and a different , but festive special sauce, to remove any hidden microaggressions and sexism from the current menu.

WHIO.com is thrilled to report that a Wisconsin man just recently eclipsed a George Clooney measured ego score in consuming the popular junk food, a reality that on one hand celebrates the unimpeded individual rights, yet squarely encapsulates the cultural addiction to what may be an unhealthy diet without moderation. Don Gorske, is apparently still alive and kicking at age 64, and has religiously consumed a pair of burgers daily since Richard Nixon was elected. The consumed Big Macs were not available immediate comments. For those scoring at home, he began his gastronomic quest in 1972, and his total consumption of delicious calories would rank as the fourth largest city in Wyoming, or roughly two times the magnitude of female friends Wilt Chamberlain has managed to cross home plate with. Ironically, Gorske’s and Chamberlain’s exploits were featured in “Supersize Me”.

Apparently, Gorske is blessed with robust genetic makeup, which has helped to counteract the brutal metabolic marathon of “two all beef patties, special sauce…”, as his vitals are well within the normal range for a person of his age. There is no indication yet, whether politicians in Seattle or San Francisco are planning to launch a “fat tax” in using tax payer funds raised from monies collected from fast food chains to build parking garages specifically to address the issue of homelessness and car camping.

Read the WHIO.com article here.

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